Use Sex Appeal to Boost Negotiations

(Warning, this article is not PG 13 rated!)

Have you ever considered the value that sex appeal has throughout a negotiation? Do you use it to boost your negotiation outcomes? Do you recognize the fact that sex appeal is prevalent in every negotiation? If you don’t, you should.

Here’s another potentially mind altering thought. It’s a recognized fact that, men and women do it differently… negotiate that is, but are you aware that sex appeal occurs when men are negotiating with other men and when women are negotiating with other women?

Before you become alarmed, let me state that I’m not indicating the emotional feelings you may have for the other negotiator, or the feelings he may possess for you, is one whereby either of you want to consummate the negotiation by performing an act of love. I’m speaking of sex appeal from one of the dictionary definitions which is, ‘stimulating attractiveness’. Some might call it an admiration you possess, but without ‘going Freudian’, I submit that there’s a lot more to the allure that you can emit and receive as the result of the appeal you and the other negotiator have for one another.

So, how do you maximize your sex appeal during a negotiation? You can start by utilizing the following strategies.

· Create an amorous environment by being somewhat appealing when negotiating. I’m not implying you should be unprofessional, or through your actions imply that there’s ‘more to come’, outside of that for which you’re negotiating. I’m suggesting, by being aware of the appeal that exist within the negotiation, you can increase the bonding process and enhance the overall flow of the negotiation.

· Have you ever liked someone so much that they made you like yourself more? Psychologically, you transferred the likable trait from the other person to yourself. In so doing, to a degree, you became like that person. When you sense someone wants to assume traits you possess, use your appeal to allow such conveyance to occur. By doing so, you’ll increase your sex appeal.

· It’s already a known fact that men and women negotiate differently. That’s not to imply that either sex should use their body to become advantaged during negotiations, but in reality they do. They do so through the smile that conveys a sentiment, a gesture that highlights agreement with a proposal, and by the manner in which they hold themselves (body language), when negotiating. Such gestures convey insight into the mental state of mind the person with whom you’re negotiating possess at that moment. Pay attention to such signals and be prepared to incorporate them in your efforts to enhance your sex appeal.

The above strategies may be difficult for some to master and implement. Once you do master the above strategies, you’ll have another strong negotiation tool from which to gain an additional advantage… and everything will be right with the world.

The Negotiation Tips Are…

· When negotiating, assess the characteristics you possess and consider what can be perceived as an allure by the other negotiator. Then, consider using that allure during the negotiations.

· Body language plays an enormous role in projecting sex appeal into a negotiation. Be cautious about crossing an imaginary line that implies there’s more to your body language intentions than what is meant.

· If you sense that misguided intentions are perceived as the result of your sex appeal being misconstrued, set the record straight sooner versus later. Don’t let sex appeal cast you in an unprofessional light.

Personal Change and the Importance of Goals In Overcoming Sex or Porn Addiction

There is an old Cornish Proverb that says ‘Those who will not be ruled by the rudder must be ruled by the rock”. This is in reference to the strands of Cornwall England where so many ships were run aground or wrecked in the middle ages because they failed to navigate the passageways to get their ships safely to shore. The application to us is that if we do not listen to reason and or take control of our lives then we must suffer the consequences of just going wherever life takes us.

There is another way that this Proverb can read and that is “Those who will not be ruled by the rutter must be ruled by the rock”. What? You might say? Did I spell it wrong? Actually no and let me explain why. The word “rudder” means the vertical blade at the stern of a vessel that can be turned to guide the direction of the ship. The word “rutter” is actually a more little known word that most do not know. The word “rutter” as defined by dictionary.com as

“A descriptive atlas of the Middle Ages, giving sailing directions and providing charts showing rhumb lines and the location of ports and various coastal features.”

We may also want to define “rhumb” while we are at it: “A curve on the surface of a sphere that cuts all meridians at the same angle. It is the path taken by a vessel or aircraft that maintains a constant compass direction”.

A ship that is ruled by a “rudder” is one that is ruled by a physical or fairly rudimentary device that all ships have – they just don’t build them without them and if they did no one would buy them. The “rudder’ needs to be operated by someone to affect the ships direction and that “operator” needs to have the knowledge of “where” and “how” to turn the vessel to guide it safely to its destination.

The “rutter” really is the key to guiding the ship or vessel safely to its destination because the “rutter” or map is one that has a cumulative knowledge of those who have gone before on the same voyage and have recorded where the “rocks” and dangerous areas are and gives exact directions on the safest route to take to get to the desired destination. The “rutter” also directs the operator to the proper course to maintain a “constant compass direction”, which is important if you want to get to your destination in a timely manner and not be wandering all over the ocean!

The wisdom in this analogy is that unless we want to wander through life without a direction, a map, or “a rutter” of where we want to go then we will either never accomplish anything of any significance or the more dangerous consequence of this mind set is that we will be thrown mercilessly into the “rocks” of life and suffer greater loss, damage, death, or disease from failing to direct our lives in a safe and more desired direction!

Another famous quote to interject at this point would be:

“For all sad words of tongue and pen, The saddest are these, ‘It might have been’.” John Greenleaf Whittier quotes (American Writer, 1807-1892)

To look back on our life and see love, accomplishment, success, family, friends, and wonderful memories will fill us with satisfaction and happiness. To look back on a life filled with addiction will fill us with hollow, unsatisfying, emptiness.

Goals are the key difference between these two drastically different outcomes. By designing your own personal “Rutter” to guide your life as well as following the paths to good destinations that others have forged will help anyone who is struggling with addiction or the way their life is going to change their final outcome from one of misery to one of joy, satisfaction, and happiness!