How to Avoid Sex in a Relationship – Here’s 3 Powerful Strategies

Many young girls and even some boys want to know how to avoid sex in a relationship. If you are not aware of this, many youngsters now prefer to abstain from sex before marriage. The risk of unwanted pregnancies and the likelihood of contracting sexually transmitted diseases are deterring a lot of wise youngsters from engaging in sex before marriage. But a problem can arise when one of the partners in the relationship wants to abstain from sex while the other wants to go ahead. There is a potential for conflict here unless the person who wants to avoid sex knows how to deal with the situation. If you find yourself in similar circumstances, this article is just for you.

3 Powerful Strategies to help convince your partner to avoid sex in a relationship

1. Most youngsters do not think about the consequences of having sex before marriage. They are too immature to stop and think about things that can go awfully wrong after the sex act. The millions of teen pregnancies and the resulting abortions that take place around the globe on a daily basis happen primarily because young people don’t stop to think about the consequences of having sex before marriage. Every time you have sex, you give birth to a consequence which could be any of the following.

Nearly 50% of all youngsters between the ages of 15 and 24 indulging in sex before marriage will contract a sexually transmitted disease. This is an official finding made by the United States government. (The source of that information is given below the article). This means that every alternate couple having sex before marriage will end up having a sexually transmitted disease. The really sad thing is most young people are not aware of this alarming fact. You can use these statistics as a deterrent to avoid having sex with your partner. Show these statistics to your partner and take the decision together to abstain from sex.

2. What do you do if your partner is not convinced? It is your health and your life that is at stake. If you contract a sexually transmitted disease, will your partner look after you or pay your medical bills? In fact you need to ask yourself several important questions, and answer those questions as honestly as you possibly can. Just think about this. Can you say for sure that your partner is not infected with any kind of sexually transmitted disease? Do you have any kind of medical evidence to prove it? Do you know for sure that your partner doesn’t have sex with anyone else? Or if they have had sex with even one more individual apart from you, can you be sure that that individual is not infected? Can you really handle a pregnancy or an abortion at this age? You need to ponder over these questions and answer them truthfully. You then need to make a quality decision. The decision that you take can literally save your life.

3. Many people are deceived with the idea of “safe sex”. But in reality, there is no such thing called “safe sex”. It is just a myth. There is abundant proof that condoms do not always prevent AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases. There is also evidence that pregnancies cannot be totally avoided with the use of pills, condoms and diaphragms. So many women still get pregnant after adopting these birth control methods. So a pregnancy can still happen, even after you have taken all these precautions. But still worse, you can end up contracting AIDS or some other life threatening disease. You need to decide whether the price you pay for a few moments of pleasure in bed has to be an unwanted pregnancy or a life-threatening disease. You can verify the statistics mentioned in this article at The United States President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief website.

The Complete Guide To Safe Sex

Long before AIDS made an entry into our dictionaries and our daily paranoias, there were other sexual scares: syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia and genital warts, to name a few. But no one really talked those days about safe sex (although some of these other sexually-transmitted infections could also eventually cost victims their lives). In stopping sexual permissiveness dead in its tracks, AIDS may well have done us a favour: because, the careful sexual behaviour that is our best security against AIDS also constitutes our best protection against other Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs).

The essence of safe sex is avoiding high-risk partners and practices, and using condom-management strategies. But when it comes down to the specifics, many questions arise:

Who are the high-risk sexual partners?

The high-risk groups are homosexuals, bi-sexuals, prostitutes, intravenous drug abusers; heterosexuals from Central Africa where AIDS is common; those who have had multiple blood transfusions in areas where AIDS is rampant. Sexual episodes with high-risk partners are the most common way the infection is passed on.

The risk of acquiring AIDS from one penis-vaginal intercourse episode with someone from a high-risk group has been estimated to be: (with condom) – 1 in 100,000 to 1 in 10,000; (without condom) – 1 in 10,000 to 1 in 1000. (The wide range of odds is because of different rates of infection among high-risk groups).

Of course, someone who’s not a high-risk partner is not necessarily a no-risk partner. When two people sleep together, it’s essentially group sex: they are in effect sleeping with everyone each of them has slept with in the past five to ten years.

How many sexual encounters with a high-risk partner would it take for the virus to be transmitted?

The virus can be transmitted through just one sexual encounter with an infected person. But the chances are less than in the case of multiple encounters with high-risk persons. In one study at the University of California, less than 10 out of 100 persons were found to have contracted the virus through a single sexual encounter with an infected person. But another study found that the odds got steadily worse with continuous sexual activity with an infected partner over a two-year periods – 12 out of 14 people ended up infected.

That is why another cardinal commandment of safe sex: avoid multiple sexual partners. Especially if they are unknown, casual partners, you have no way of knowing which of them is infected, and with every encounter, the laws of probability favour you less and less. Sex with a single, known, trustworthy partner is one of your best armour devices against serious infection. So, if you’ve tried the rest, now try the best: monogamy!

Is a man more likely to give the infection to a woman than the other way round?

Sperm does appear to contain a higher concentration of the virus then vaginal secretions and the virus does appear to be more efficiently transmitted from men to women then from women to men. But men shouldn’t get too smug about this. In Africa, where the disease has had more time to do its work, there’s a one-to-one infection ratio between men and women.

Which is the most risky sexual practice?

Without question, anal intercourse without a condom. The walls of the rectum are thinner than the vaginal walls and therefore more prone to abrasions and tears. So, the AIDS virus from an infected partner’s semen is absorbed more easily during anal sex.

Other high-risk practices (with an infected partner) are condomless vaginal intercourse fellatio, cunnilingus, the sharing of insertive sex toys and anything that would involve blood contact.

Moderate-risk practices are French kissing, oral sex using condoms, vaginal sex using condoms and spermicide, and anal intercourse using condoms and spermicide.

How safe is kissing?

The AIDS virus is carried by bodily fluids – apart from semen and blood, that includes urine, vaginal secretions, tears, saliva and even faeces.

Does that make practices like oral sex and ‘tongue kissing’ unsafe? The virus is found only rarely in saliva. In a study of 83 patients (reported in The New England Journal of Medicine), the virus was detected in the saliva of only one.

In another study reported in the same journal, in families where an AIDS -infected member shared food, drink, cutlery and crockery with the others, not a single non-infected person caught the virus.

In these same households, members kissed each other without spreading AIDS. Kissing on the cheeks and lips appears to be perfectly safe. And, to date, there’s no evidence that saliva transmits the virus.

Still, since the virus has been isolated in saliva (although in rare cases), caution is the better part of l’amour, especially where deep kissing or French kissing – the kind that curls your toes – is concerned. In the U.S., the Surgeon-General has advised against it. While there has been no documented case of the spread of AIDS in this way, it would be difficult to document because people who start with this kind of kissing often don’t stop there. Although most researchers feel that transmission is unlikely even from erotic kissing because there probably wouldn’t be an adequate amount of virus in the saliva or a sufficient amount of saliva exchanged, the fact remains that it’s theoretically possible.

How risky is oral sex?

So far, researchers haven’t confirmed a single case – in either homosexuals or heterosexuals – attributable to it. But, as with deep kissing, it’s difficult to document because oral sex so often goes along with other sexual activities. Therefore, the experts advise against letting semen enter the mouth. The risk is lowered if the man wears a condom or doesn’t ejaculate in his partner’s mouth. But both need to remember that a small amount of the virus may be present in the pre-ejaculatory fluid.

Oral sex is less risky for a heterosexual man, because he usually comes in contact with less fluids. Still, the virus can exist in small concentration in vaginal fluids.

What are the safe-sex activities you can indulge in with a partner of doubtful credentials?

There are several such activities you can enjoy short of intercourse: dry kissing, hugging and caressing, massage and mutual masturbation (provided the man does not ejaculate near the woman’s vagina; and provided vaginal secretion do not come in contact with broken skin).

Don’t condoms offer foolproof protection against STDs?

Condoms have been shown to be laboratory-effective in blocking the transmission of gonorrhea, syphilis and herpes. The most efficient are latex condoms which have been studied under the electron microscope – neither bacteria nor viruses have been able to penetrate them. That includes the AIDS virus, which is about 25 times smaller than a sperm.

Some experts however have their doubts about the efficacy of condoms made from natural skin, such as lambskin, in blocking transmission of the microscopic AIDS virus. These condoms are made of hundreds of layers of porous collagen. Although the chances of a virus navigating through them are slim, lab tests have shown it’s possible.

However: Even with latex condoms, when it comes down to actual practice, they have never been anywhere near 100 per cent reliable. They slip, they break, and people often don’t use them soon enough, or withdraw them carefully enough. Consider this noteworthy statistic: one out of 10 women who rely on condoms as contraception still get pregnant each year – although contraception can occur only a few days each month. In contrast, you are susceptible to the AIDS virus 365 days a year.

Here’s how condoms fared in one real-life study of couples, one of whom was infected and relied on condoms to prevent the spread of the virus to the non-infected partner. After using condoms for between one to three years, three of the 18 spouses contracted the virus, a failure rate of 17 per cent. Says the study’s chief researcher, Margaret Fischl of the University Of Miami School Of Medicine, “Our study shows that using condoms decreases the risk, but clearly it’s not a foolproof system”. Evidently, there is still no such thing as ‘safe sex’ with an infected partner – only degrees of risk.

How can you improve your margin of safety using condoms?

  • One of the best ways is to use them in tandem with s spermicide which contains the active ingredient nonoxynol-9. This ingredient has been shown to kill the herpes and AIDS viruses (at least under lab conditions).
  • Choose latex condoms over those made of animal membrane such as lambskin. Latex is less porous.
  • Choose the well-known brands. They are more likely to have undergone thorough testing and less likely to have undetected holes.
  • As a general rule, the thicker the condom the greater your margin of safety. (That again makes latex your best bet).
  • Check that the condom you use has a reservoir or receptacle at the end so that semen can’t spill over the sides during ejaculation. By catching semen in its reservoir, this kind of condom also lowers rupture risks to near-zero.
  • Never use petroleum-based lubricants such as petroleum jelly with a latex condom – they will cause the latex to disintegrate. But, lubrication does help prevent condom from tearing. Use K-Y jelly, water or – best of all – a spermicide containing nonoxynol-9. (Do not use saliva).
  • Put on the condom as soon as erection occurs, don’t wait until ejaculation is imminent – some viruses may escape in the pre-ejaculatory fluid.
  • When you remove the condom from its wrapper and place it over the tip of your penis, make sure it doesn’t catch on a ring or fingernail.
  • The condom should seal tightly to your skin. A condom that makes hasty withdrawal necessary, and semen spillage possible, is injurious to your partner’s health!
  • Withdraw right after ejaculation, because if the erection is lost the condom may slip off, allowing semen to escape. Hold on to the rim of the condom as the penis is being withdrawn.
  • Dispose of the condom safely so that no one (a child, for example) could accidentally come in contact with semen.
  • Don’t ‘store’ a pare condom in your wallet or the glove compartment of your car. Heat damages latex. Condoms should be stored in a cool, dry place like a bedside drawer.

What else, in the sexual arena, increases your risk of catching AIDS?

Sexually transmitted diseases, particularly syphilis and chancroid, are associated with genital ulcers, which allow the HIV virus easy access to the bloodstream.

Isn’t there any foolproof protection against AIDS?

There are two. One is to stay celibate: an answer which, for most of us, is of course a non-answer.

The second is to have sex only with a partner who has been tested for AIDS. But this is not an easy, or practical, as it sounds. It arises from the fact that the so-called “AIDS test” is not really a test for AIDS at all. It is a blood test that detects the presence of antibodies produced by the body to fight the invading virus – called the Human Immunodeficiency Virus. (It’s therefore called the HIV test). If the test detects these antibodies, what it means is that, at some point of time, the person was infected by the virus.

However – and this is where the main snag arises – it takes anything from a fortnight to six months for the body to produce the HIV antibodies. This is the so-called “window phase” – the period during which the infection, while already present, may not be signaled by the test because the antibodies haven’t yet been produced. What this means is that a negative result on the HIV test (no antibodies) is valid only if the test has been done at least six months after the last sexual exposure.

On the other hand, there have also been problems with the use of the ELISA test to detect HIV antibodies – quite commonly, especially in the case of heterosexuals, ELISA has shown false positives! To exclude the possibility of error, a positive result with ELISA must be confirmed with the so-called Western Blot test. If the results are confirmed, that’s bad news, but both tests should be repeated a few weeks later to ensure that there was no mix-up in blood samples in the lab.

However, even if a potential sexual partner has been certified as HIV-negative, remember that sex with such a partner is ‘safe’ only until his/her next sexual encounter. After that, as they say, all bets are off. (Unless, of course, you and this partner enter into a mutually monogamous relationship – after you too have tested negative!)

What’s the bottomline in safe sex?

It’s that, where safe sex is concerned, it’s better to be a believer in healthy overreaction than to go by the no-case-yet norm. As late as 1984, the medical world was saying we have ‘no case yet’ of the heterosexual spread of AIDS. One year later, oops, we’d got one. Since AIDS may have a few other unhealthy surprises in store, it’s better to err on the side of caution.

One morsel of good news: while some people acquire the virus after just a single exposure, others don’t acquire it after repeated exposures. What this means is that, even if you’ve been having unprotected sex for years, it’s conceivably not yet too late to start protecting yourself.

Use condoms, use caution, use commonsense – remember, the AIDS virus cannot get you without your active co-operation!

Sex Diseases Are Raging, 15 Million Clean US Folks Ruined 2006, Stray A Bit & U Got Possible DEATH

I have been writing lots of love vs lust articles lately. I know a lot about this plus there are so many people out there that do not. One thing that is interesting is that 75% of all people 20 and under have had premarital sex. When you get up to age 44 it is 95%.

It is obvious to anyone past 50 that the sexual nature of humanity has changed, with sex being more open and seemingly more dangerous. I really do not think porn helps anyone but the seller. The authors of porn get mega-rich, while opening crevices in minds that should be left closed. I consider porn dangerous and a breeder of sex crimes and unfaithfulness and childhood experimentation.

You have heard that AIDS started with man having sex with the Green Monkey. Well I don’t know but one day a male aircraft attendant gets off the airplane and sets the homosexual community upside down. I mean one guy, wherever he got it , has killed more than a million people with an infected sex organ. Probably millions of people.

Male lust in Africa has no soul. They have intercourse with babies. Anything that is a woman that can take it gets poked by lust crazy men and we cannot stop it. The lust is so strong they just keep it up. AIDS has cost the taxpayer millions and millions of dollars and the horny men keep on keeping on.

Now here is what the US Government says to women to avoid STD’s

“There are steps you can take to keep from getting an STD:

Don’t have sex. The best way to prevent any STD is to practice abstinence, or not having vaginal, oral, or anal sex.

Be faithful. Have a sexual relationship with one partner who has been tested for STDs and is not infected is another way to reduce your chances of getting infected. Be faithful to each other, meaning that you only have sex with each other and no one else.

Use condoms. Protect yourself with a condom EVERY time you have vaginal, anal, or oral sex. Condoms should be used for any type of sex with every partner. For vaginal sex, use a latex male condom or a female polyurethane condom. For anal sex, use a latex male condom. For oral sex, use a dental dam. A dental dam is a rubbery material that can be placed over the anus or the vagina before sexual contact.

Know that some methods of birth control, like birth control pills, shots, implants, or diaphragms, will not protect you from STD. If you use one of these methods, be sure to also use a latex condom or dental dam (used for oral sex) correctly every time you have sex.

Talk with your sex partner(s) about STD and using condoms. It’s up to you to make sure you are protected. Remember, it’s YOUR body! For more information, call the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention at (800) 232-4636.

Talk frankly with your doctor or nurse and your sex partner(s) about any STD you or your partner have or had. Try not to be embarrassed.

Have regular pelvic exams. Talk with your doctor about how often you need them. Many tests for STD can be done during an exam. Ask your doctor to test you for STD. The sooner an STD is found, the easier it is to treat.

For More Information . . .
You can find out more about STD by contacting the National Women’s Health Information Center 800-994-9662″

My advice is “Know Your Man”. If you are going to start a sexual relationship, don’t start it on the sofa or in the car. Both of you go get tested. If he says he is a virgin, make him do it anyway. Then stay with him until the next guy and get tested again. No one is going to pay attention to me however unless you see some photo’s of venereal disease effects and then maybe it will stick with you.

If you take a few minutes to get on the web and check out STD’s you might pay attention. The photo’s will make you sick.